So today my fiance and I have announced our engagement and will be getting married in August, in Seattle, WA. The process has been a fairly long one and to give you an idea I will try and rant about it in the next couple of posts.

Neda and I have gotten to know each other over the course of our volunteer service at the Baha’i World Centre here in Haifa. The process of investigation someone’s character to see if you are suitable for marriage is not an easy task, in fact it is probably the most important decision in your life and what I have realized throughout this time is that a) it requires that know yourself well so you know what you are looking for in a partner and b) there are certain aspects about yourself that you get to find out as the process starts.

A popular question among people that want to hear our story is what attracted me to Neda (or vice versa) and what made me realize that she is the one. The best way that I can answer this as it is a process I have been going through that includes many internalized feelings and thoughts that are not always that easy to express is to use an analogy I once heard in another context (but it makes perfect sense when related to marriage). Looking at life on this planet as a rock climbing journey which is challenging, fun, educating and sometimes difficult, having a partner is a good thing. You can take turns on securing the rope, sometimes one leads the other, other times your partner can be better than you in climbing in snow or darkness and can coach and mentor you. This is a journey that is fun but by no means easy and you will go through tests.

Simply put you are looking for certain qualities in that partner that you deem as fundamental for success of the journey, but also qualities that you prefer to see but might not be that important. Add to that the fact that you have to be able to handle your partners weaknesses (and this is true for all of us as we all are far from being perfect).

The analogy is by no means complete as the purpose of life is a little more than just going on a journey together, but to wrap off this post, I wanted to add this quote from ‘Abdu’l-Baha that I read this morning:

“Wherefore, wed Thou in the heaven of Thy mercy these two birds of the nest of Thy love, and make them the means of attracting perpetual grace; that from the union of these two seas of love a wave of tenderness may surge and cast the pearls of pure and goodly issue on the shore of life.” —‘Abdu’l-Bahá

Next post: 95 days of engagement, consent of parents and fiance visa application process

[Update: for those interested, the wedding website is here.]